Emily in Paris Gets Married
Picture this: you move to Paris and meet a tall, dark, and handsome Frenchman.
You fall in love. He asks you to marry him. You say, oui. By saying yes to the Frenchman, you are also saying yes to France. It’s an easy yes to the wine and croissants, but a reluctant yes to French administration.
This is our journey from engagement to “I do.” For those of you who are curious, and perhaps those of you following a similar path, I hope I can shed some light on this romantic yet laborious feat.
The Proposal
Christmas Eve following our engagement.
Antoine and I got engaged on December 22, 2023. I was home in South Carolina, spending Christmas with my family. I knew an engagement was coming and had even bought a dress for the occasion. I was scheduled to fly back to France on the 30th and spend New Year’s Eve with my boyfriend, though I suspected he would be promoted to fiancé before the evening was over.
Boy, was I wrong! Antoine and my family pulled off the surprise of my life! He showed up at my parent’s house with a diamond ring, a ring he’d designed and had approved by my best friend. Oh yeah, he did good.
We spent Christmas with my family before flying back to France to live happily ever after. But this is where the fairytale ends and the headache begins.
The Preparation
We’d already made an appointment at La Mairie (French city hall) before the proposal. Yes, you read that right. I secured a rendez-vous before the groom secured the bride! After 3 years in France, I’ve learned it’s best to plan ahead. But before the appointment, we had a big file to prepare. The French adore their paperwork.
This file or, dossier included:
Copies of the bride and groom’s IDs, birth certificates, and lease agreements.
Copies of our witnesses IDs.
The full names, addresses and professions of the bride and groom, witnesses and immediate family members. (Why they needed to know where my brother lives and what he does is beyond me.)
A document that does not exist in the US called a certificat de coutume et célibat, which translates to “certificate of custom and celibacy,” and proves that one is single and free to marry.
Oh, and the copies of our birth certificates had to be dated within the past 3 months and mine had to be translated into French. While in South Carolina, I went to the Department of Health and Environmental Control to obtain a copy of my birth certificate. Then I went to the Secretary of State’s office to get an apostille. Finally, Antoine took my birth certificate to a translator in Paris and had it translated into French.
We carefully assembled our documents, triple-checked that everything was correct, and handed over our precious (and expensive) file to the woman at city hall. I almost asked if she wanted the receipt for the coffee I bought that morning, a blood sample, or my firstborn child (nope, not pregnant. We did get married quickly but I promise y’all, there’s no bun in my oven).
After scrutinizing each piece of paper, she submitted our file for approval. Once approved, our intended union would have to be publicized by both mine and Antoine’s city halls and posted at their buildings’ entrance for 10 days, in case anyone wished to object. And yes, it is the year 2023. The French love their traditions, as archaic as some may be.
Normally, you must wait until the 10 day period is over before setting a wedding date. We got lucky. A couple had to reschedule their wedding and City Hall offered us their slot. We were to be married just 5 weeks after submitting our file. This was great news because we were in a hurry.
Even though I’ve worked in France for 3 years, I was unable to renew my last visa before it expired in December. Americans can stay in France without a visa for 90 days. Ever heard of “90 Day Fiancé?” Well, combine that with “Emily in Paris” and you’ve got my life.
Our French Civil Ceremony
The Ceremony
On the morning of February 11th, my parents and I made our way to The Mairie de Levallois-Perret. I’d walked past this City Hall almost daily for the past three years. Often I thought to myself, “wow, what a beautiful place for a wedding.” Antoine and I were married in a quaint ceremony with a few loved ones by our side. It wasn’t what I’d pictured as a little girl, but it was perfect.
Back to the US
Just 11 days after saying “I do,” Antoine and I said goodbye and I flew back across the Atlantic to apply for my new visa. Estimated processing time was 3 weeks to 3 months. To my surprise, I received my new visa in 6 days!
But what I could not do in 6 days was plan a wedding. Our ceremony in France was small, so we’re having an American celebration this summer. For the past few weeks I’ve been busy making plans and seeing to all of the details. My cousin and I even took a few days and had a bachelorette party in Nashville!
Finally, the preparations are finished. My wedding dress has been altered, the guest list has been finalized and the cake has been ordered. This weekend, my matron of honor is giving me a wedding shower (something that does not exist in France).
Next week, I get to fly home to my husband.
Back to France, for now
These weeks of separation have been hard, but I’m comforted by the fact that this is my last solo trip.
In America (or at least in South Carolina), you can have a marriage license within 24 hours. In France, it normally takes between 2 to 3 months! The fact that we got it done in 5 weeks is a miracle. The French administration was a headache, but our French ceremony was beautiful. This summer we get to celebrate our marriage again! Only this time, I’ll be wearing a long, white dress.
Stay tuned. My season of “Emily is Paris,” is far from over.